I am in mourning for the loss of my best friend, Donna. A friend I have known for over 30 years. A friend who saved my life at least three times. A friend who was my sister-by-choice. I receive condolences from others, most saying, “I’m sorry for your loss,” which respects my mourning, my sorrow, and shares compassion, caring, and love for both my friend and me. If someone told me, “Yeah, it hurts when anyone dies,” I wouldn’t feel any compassion from them or any understanding of the depth of my pain – in fact, it trivializes her death as just something that happens all the time. Right now, People of Color are mourning a death – actually, a brutal murder. Their pain is deep, endless. This death is added to countless other deaths of People of Color. The compassionate response to their mourning is “I’m sorry for your loss, Black Lives Matter.” Responding to their pain, their mourning, with “All Lives Matter” is like someone telling me “Yeah, it hurts when anyone dies.” Please have compassion for others suffering a loss, others mourning a death. Yes, I am Caucasian, White, and I have not experienced the racism People of Color have. I share my compassion and support of people grieving a death, just as others who don’t understand the depth of my loss, my pain, my mourning, compassionately tell me “I am sorry for your loss.”



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